So I just finished volunteering at the cancer center, and I'm over in the parking lot changing back into my regular clothes (come to the Moore's cancer center parking lot mondays at 5:00 to see Mike stripping . . . tickets are going fast) when i realize that my cell phone is no longer in my pocket. Having never lost anything of value in my life (well, monetary value at least) I started getting a little worried, and started looking all over my car for it. After realizing that I need to vacuum my car, I started thinking that maybe I had left it at home, since due to my excellent attributes of organization and perception there's no way I could have possibly lost it. I had just about convinced myself of this and was moments from driving away when the wild idea dawns on me to look under my car. While getting on my hands and knees and trying not to notice the old woman staring at me (I'm not stripping anymore at this point mind you) I see the freakin cell phone under the car next to mine!! Obviously it fell out while I was changing pants. I was seconds away from driving away from my precious cell phone that nobody ever calls me on. So, the moral of this long and seemingly pointless story is that whenever you're stripping in a public area, to always listen for falling cell phones (that belong to you, or even better, to other people).
Randy: Oh no, my fancy green laser pointer is running out of batteries. I need someone to run over to the student store and buy me some. Mike!! You go! The exercise is good for you anyway! We should all go out for a run!
*Mike gets up and runs out the door just as someone says they have batteries*
Randy: Wait!! Mike!! Come back!!
*Mike tries to come back but door is now locked and must resort to knocking which results in laughter coming from within the lecture hall just as Randy opens the door*
Randy: What the hell do you want?? By the way, could you go run and get me a latte?
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